Unplugged Weddings Are About Being In the Moment

This post has been updated in 2023.

Sometime back in the mid to early 2010s, I shared this link to a blog post by Corey Ann Photography about Unplugged Weddings.

Some people agree with Corey, and I’ve seen many others who vehemently disagree with her, and have some very not so nice things to say.

Me? I have a different take on unplugged weddings. A different reason for it. 

I have been photographing weddings for many, many years, and I have definitely noticed a big shift in behavior over the past few years with smart phones, tablets and iPads and digital cameras. Technology has changed us.

Back in the days of film, a few guests might bring cameras, but since a roll of film was limited to 24 pictures, you used those 24 pictures wisely, and you maybe only snapped off a handful of shots throughout the day. Now, people take 300 pictures and think nothing of it.

The Original Intent of Unplugged Weddings

The original intent of Unplugged Weddings was really to prevent guests from stepping out into the aisle to take their own (probably really shitty photo) and ruining the first kiss or the recessional for the professional photographer that the couple paid thousands of dollars to be there and capture those moments for them.

The educational campaigns have paid off though, and guests tend to be aware they shouldn’t do these things now, so it isn’t so much of an issue. (We still have Uncle Bobs though, but until the Patriarchy is smashed I don’t believe they’ll be going anywhere. And I genuinely don’t mind Uncle Bob until he starts mansplaining my job to me.)

What happened to visiting with people?

In a different time, if there was a break before the reception, you went to lunch or for drinks with friends and family. Then during the reception, you chatted and socialized, face to face, not online, and danced the night away. You celebrated because that’s what weddings are. They’re celebrations.

Sadly, that’s often not how it is anymore. People scroll Instagram and TikTok on their phone instead of striking up conversations with people they haven’t seen in awhile. Kids are on phones instead of jumping around with the other kids on the dance floor. Teenagers are glued to their phones instead of talking to their second cousin, who is the same age as them (and btw, is also glued to their phone).

And don’t get me started on the Boomers. They are hands down the absolute worst group in terms of having a device in their hands at all times. Usually they’re talking to people, but they’re also the group that takes too many photos and steps on the toes of the professional event staff. Boomers are living life through their screens. They need Unplugged Weddings for a multitude of reasons. (Oh! Oh! Speaking of Boomers, have ya’ll seen @CallMeKristenMarie on Instagram? RIOTOUS LAUGHTER because it really hits home.) 

A social obligation or a chance for fun?

At some point in time, weddings became a social obligation. Or maybe it just seems that way to me, as an outsider looking in. Excited to be there guests aren’t slack in the face as they sit slouched over their phone, scrolling until their brain is numb. It’s time to change that. I think a true Unplugged Wedding (where guests turn the phones completely off or set their phones to Do Not Disturb) can help us enjoy weddings again. Our attention spans won’t be competing for device vs. human interaction when we take the device away. (Those pings and vibrations! It gets us every time.)

Deep in the pandemic, in 2020, we were desperate for human interaction. We WANTED hugs and socialization. We thought we’d NEVER get back to “normal” and it’s quite ironic how quickly we did get back to avoiding social interaction again.

What an Unplugged Wedding Means in 2023: Set an intentionality for yourself to live in the moment and be present. 

Unplugged Weddings in 2023 aren’t about stripping guests of their rights to photograph you. Your guests are 100% allowed to take snapshots and photograph the day on their phones if they want to. I never want to take away anyone’s autonomy.

It’s about giving them the freedom to put down their devices. Relax. Enjoy themselves. It’s about not letting our devices control us. (Devices have become the modern-day Maximum Overdrive. That should remake that movie with that idea. No one steal that from me. I’m going to pitch it.)

That email will still be there in a few hours. If you were really having as much fun as your status or that selfie said you were, you wouldn’t be on social media in the first place. Don’t worry about getting every shot, that’s what I’m there for. And THIS is why couples have Unplugged Weddings.

Live in the moment. Let me capture it.

So set your device down. Trust me. I got this. Enjoy the moment and the day. Let me get some candid shots of you, being a part of the wedding day and a part of the ceremony and events, laughing with family and friends, and out having fun on the dance floor. Let me snap a shot of you watching the first kiss and the first dance…. Don’t let the only candid shots of you be as a bystander in the background with your face scrunched in a weird expression as you watch life happen through your screen, or worse, an obviously uninterested, bored guest sitting slouched at the table.

How to have an Unplugged Wedding

There’s a million and one pins on Pinterest for ways to have an Unplugged Wedding.

Signs at the Ceremony

Signs at the ceremony are always a good reminder! Etsy and Pinterest are your best resources for these!

Have Your Officiant Make an Announcement

My biggest tip is to have your officiant share a few words with your guests at the beginning of the ceremony about WHY you’re having an Unplugged Wedding. Often, guests think you just don’t want them to get in the photographer’s way or you just don’t want them to take photos. Sharing the sentiment that you want them to be fully present with you on this day will make a deeper impact than a cutesy “Unplugged Wedding” sign you snagged off Etsy. 

Gently remind guests to present during the reception

Remind guests to turn their phones off during a welcome toast at the reception. You can also place little signs on the bar asking guests to practice intentionality with you on this special day by turning their devices to “Do Not Disturb” and fully living in the present moment.

Give guests a way to take photos without their phones

Place disposable cameras or Paper Shoot Cameras on the tables so guests can still take photos without using their phones.

Share your wedding images with the guests

Often, guests will take photos because they don’t think they’ll ever see any photos from the day. Let guests know where they can go to see photos after the wedding. (For example, I make a custom slideshow for each of my clients with highlights from the wedding day that the couple can share on social media, or upload to YouTube or Vimeo.)

However you choose to do it, having an Unplugged Wedding will help you enjoy the day and set intentionality.

Jaimie Nicole Krause is a documentary wedding photographer specializing in adventure elopements and intimate gatherings in Joshua Tree, CA and St. Louis, MO. You can find her on Instagram or contact her at hello@jaimienicolekrause.com. Click here to find out more about working with Jaimie. 

For more helpful blog posts, check out Wedding Day Portrait Tips, Wedding Day Timeline Planning Tips, and Tips for a Stress-Free Engagement Session